Thursday Special: A Slightly Spooky Bonus CENTERfold

You guys.

YOU GUYS.

I am a creature of habit, and I was all geared up to do a Thursday Five today. Honest. It was going to feature homes with fabulous custom closets, if you must know, and I had 75% of the lovely home porn I needed to fill it out. I was browsing the unholy carnival of lies and deceit that is Zillow, searching for one more high-end walk-in to make my life (and my post) complete. And then, my friends, this happened.

Offbeat and fabulous, this home’s appeal starts with the front door.

From the outside, 212 Delancey looks like any other Society Hill townhome. Unassumingly posh, with 3 bedrooms and 4 baths, and priced smack dab in the low end of the chi-chi Center City Millionaires’ Club at $1,195,000, one might be tempted to shrug this one off as just another pretty, unattainable abode that’s smack-dab in one of Philly’s best nabes.

Is that a two-headed chicken in the background? Never mind. In my heart, it officially is.

And then, my friends. And then you step inside.

There’s something very New Orleans-graveyard chic going on here, and I’m totally loving it.

I have never in my life been so conflicted between “wtf” and “holy AWESOME, Batman!” as I was when I first spotted these pictures. It’s like my very soul was split in half.

THOSE CHAIRS.

On one hand, it’s a little bit like Tim Burton’s set dresser rampaged through the house with a Victorian grandma strapped to his back. On the other, it’s freaking fantastic. Between the trim and the current decor, it’s a little bit “A Rose For Emily,” a little bit Nightmare Before Valentine’s Day, and a little Miss-Havisham-Goes-Home-Haute-Couture.

Stained glass, top-of-the-line appliances, and custom cabinetry!

One thing you can’t argue, this home is luxe to the max. From Travertine tile to hand-painted wallpaper, marble floors to stained glass accents, just about every square inch of trim is top of the line.

If you’re going whimsical, may as well commit.

It’s a one-of-a-kind dwelling in many ways, with artisan accents everywhere you look. For the buyer with a wild heart and a penchant for the Gothic, this place is a dream come true.

A bathroom fit for either a ’20s flapper or the Maid of Shalott – now that’s something.

I could spend more time belaboring myself over the fine details of this home, but I firmly believe that, in this case, seeing is believing.

Again with the “Midnight In the Garden of Good and Evil” / Holy City vibes. Can’t you just imagine writing poetry by moonlight with a glass of absinthe out here? I think I’m 100% in love.

This home’s a fresh-faced noob on the market, and solely by virtue of location, probably won’t last. I’m glad I got a peek at it before it is snapped up!