One Little List: Some Blasts From Philly’s Past

True confession time: I’m a redditor. Self-styled as “the front page of the internet,” reddit is a little bit social media, a little bit news, a little bit entertainment… and a whole lot of time-suck. We have a love-hate relationship, reddit and me. The culture there is pretty bro-tastic and more than a little neckbeardy, but if you can tolerate vast quantities of condescension, Brony memes, and the occasional landmines of unmarked NSFW/NSFL(ife) Imgur links, there’s some great content. One of my favorite “subreddits,” or forums, is (naturally!), r/Philadelphia. It’s great for heaping doses of civic pride and gross cynicism in one place, basically.

I was browsing the r/philly archives, and uncovered a pretty fantastic thread, entitled “What’s your favorite historical fact about Philadelphia that everyone should know about, but doesn’t?” It’s Wednesday, and nobody feels like reading big chunks of text on hump day, so I pulled some of the choicest factoids and compiled a list. And because no one needs to know any more minutiae about the “Rocky steps” or that big ol’ bell, I stuck to five of the best. You’re welcome.

You just know the “Sassafras Street Pier” would have been epic. Photo: Van Luvender, Creative Commons

1.) We are #1 at firsts
America’s first car, telephone, merry-go-round, ice cream soda, revolving door, circus, Girl Scout cookie, YMCA, bubble gum – and a whole bunch of others – were all claimed by Philly. Pretty fantastic, right? We totally also nailed the nation’s first public health crisis with the first smallpox epidemic on the continent. Oops.

2.) Bury my heart at Logan Square
Folks who needed killin’ met their maker via the gallows at Logan Square. Not only were public executions held here for quite some time, but a bunch of people were buried there, too. Creepy.

3.) Much ado about street names
Did you realize that most east/west thoroughfares in North Philly are named after Pennsylvania counties – Allegheny, Erie, Susquehanna, Tioga? Yeah, you probably did. Since you’re a smartypants, you also knew that the avenues in South Philly were dubbed for some notable state governors: Reed, Packer, McKean, Bigler. Here ‘round these parts, we stroll on Walnut and Chestnut Streets daily. But do you remember when Arch and Race Streets were named Mulberry and Sassafras, in keeping with the arbortorial theme? I’m going to assume not, but your great-great-great grandma might. All those tree names hearken back to the city’s Quaker founders, who didn’t believe in naming streets after people. Rumor has it that there’s a similar explanation for why we have a Front Street instead of a First Street… because “nobody is first in line to the Lord.”

4.) That dude Rittenhouse? Was pretty awesome.
He was a complete genius, first of all. David Rittenhouse was actually so influential to astronomy in his time that THEY NAMED A MOON CRATER AFTER HIM… in addition to the city’s poshest nabe. #whenwillyourcitysfaves

American history, y’all.

5.) Yeah, we’re that obsessed with B.Franks…
…so much that we immortalized the spot where he relieved himself. There’s an obvious joke here about, uh, extruding excellence, but I’ll leave it to you to figure it out.